January 10th, 2019 by Kurt "Chet" Christel

Evil will always triumph because good is dumb!

It’s the Splatfest of December 2018 and in celebration of SUPER SMASH BROS ULTIMATE, the competition is between HERO vs VILLAIN. Chet join Team villain and explains why. He also keep forgetting to use his special, and doesn’t know how the squid beacon works.

PART I
PART II



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Splatfest November 2018 results
November 22nd, 2018 by Kurt "Chet" Christel

Buenos Nachos, Amigo

The game is over and the winner has been announced. In a complete shutout, Team Salsa defeated Team Guac in all 3 categories. Most popular, most clout in normal, most clout in pro. Hat trick. Sweep. That’s enough sports terms. Funnily enough, less accusations of cheating have been thrown around. Unlike last time, there aren’t any suspicious screencaps floating around. During our time with it, we both had an early on session in the day, and one later at night, where we were paired with other people from team salsa for many same-team battles. It happened too often. Something had to be up for there to be that many fights from the same team. I mean, how do they even score that? Only the winning team gives clout and the other does not? Probably. Either way, that’s the Splatfest November 2018 results for ya.

Chet was able to record himself, this time in style. Going on full streamer mode, he played the game while putting up his face on camera for all to see. Also he was terrible. He did not help in anyway. Point and laugh! And also, tell us what our gameplay vids need. More comedy? More popups? More fast editing? Tell us below. Enjoy!




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Splatfest November 2018
November 10th, 2018 by Kurt "Chet" Christel

Tasty Taco Tribulations Test

Nacho chips are pretty good. You know, I’ve cut myself off of all junk food, but when it comes to snacks… I cannot resist two things. Number 2 on that list is nacho chips. Whether it’s straight from the supermarket or restaurant serving, they are great. If you’re like many people, you’ve come to realize that the $2 bag of Santitas is the real deal. You’ve also come to another conclusion, and that’s what to serve your nachos with.

Are you thinking about queso? Well too bad. Queso sauce doesn’t count because it tastes good on literally everything. Tacos? Queso. Steak? Queso. Fish? Queso. Nay, we’re here to talk about the Splatfest November 2018 event. Coming to a Nintendo Switch near you, enjoy getting to choose between the best to nacho companions by duel. The theme? Salsa vs Guacamole. You are choosing between a tomato and peppers mixture versus a fulfilling avocado and lime paste. Okay, honestly both those sound terrible by description. But connoisseurs of Mexican cuisine will be able to tell you all about how they both are amazing.

Salsa. A delicious and spicy addition to the crunchy, wholesome, salty taste of the chips. The spicy aroma and taste certain add a layer of action to the tortillas, don’t you think? Just thinking about it makes you crave it. Let’s talk about a real restaurant. A local authentic Mexican cuisine restaurant with great prices has a fun addition. You see, normally some Mexican restaurants will give you the tortilla chips and call it a day. If you’re at Chipotle or Moe’s. Moe’s has a ton of salsa selections in particular. But nothing can beat the local place that serves hot salsa with a layer of refried beans and cheese on top of it. That’s what this local place does, and that’s what makes it amazing.

Guacamole. A soothing, smooth topping to the crunchy, hard satisfaction of chips. In this case, the smooth taste of the avocado mashed up with other ingredients is the perfect recipe. If you live in California, you are overexposed to the vegetable and are disqualified. But anyone else? We have to pay the restaurants EXTRA if we want to get some guacamole. In one particular local authentic Mexican restaurant that is not the one above, they have it special. You get served a freshly made batch right in front of you. The waiter comes over with a tray full of the ingredients, puts them in a bowl, and mashes it up all before you. It’s rather impressive, the mixes needed to make perfect guac.

If I had to pick one, I’d go with team Salsa. Salsa is an absolute essential when it comes to tortilla chips. On top of those, it’s also essential for tacos. The truth is, you can always go for some cause with it. Salsa comes in many varieties. These include mild, medium, hot, very hot, super hot, and ‘why is this green?’. Those are a lot of varieties. On the other hand, guac is a luxury that is only good once in a while. If you had this several times in a row and still want it the next day, you’re either a dirty Californian or crazy. Guacamole is good as a treat but is certainly not necessary for all servings of chips. But it is definitely orbiting around the salsa. It always comes with salsa.

Salsa is the key to victory. Our deliciously spicy destiny awaits us. Together, we shall do our best to combat the enemy to victory. We will prove once and for all that salsa is the best snack enhancement of all time!

The festivities run from 8pm PT/11pm ET on November 16, 2018 until 8pm PT/11pm ET on November 17, 2018.




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team treat cheat
October 26th, 2018 by Kurt "Chet" Christel

Halloween Splatfest Drama

The big spooktacular Splatfest October 2018 is done-zo! It was a big powerful 2-day festival and the winner has been declared. In the war between tricks or treats, it was Team Treat who succeeded 2-1. They lost out on popularity but they pulled through on victories. It was a valiant effort and many claimed that it was one of the toughest splatfests in a while.

You would assume all is well, but alas, it is not! ItĀ seems that the results have actually caused quite a ruckus in the squidkid community. It appears that many of the people on team Trick have accused Treat of CHEATING. Now, normally this is just a thing that losers do whenever a big competition ends and they lose. Saying the team cheated, had a biased judge, got away with bending the rules, and other such things. Normally, this would be the case for most Splatfests. This is actually an okay accusation because it has been known that Splatoon 2 is not short on its number of cheaters. The part where Nintendo now charges for online play still doesn’t account for this issue and has created its own drama. But even so, why are these accusations different?

They are different because there are several screencaps that depict a very suspicious ruling over who won a match. This has many people concerned that the ratings may have somehow been glitched or biased! Have a look at the series of images here, it is considered suspect and debatable.

HMG- Splatoon Cheaters?

That is a bit… disturbing, is it not? Well, if that isn’t enough, let’s hear it from some commenters on the case throughout the net! Have a look at THESE samples:

Thread 1-1

Some of the usual suspects show up. There’s lots of talk about lag. A LOT of talk about lag. We can talk about lag for days. You also have people just writing everything off as “losers just complaining.” That’s an easy thing to say, but the bizarre screencaps insist otherwise.

That said, some people are saying that the map screens are inaccurate at depicting who won. Why? Apparently, the dark purple shade makes it look like less ink was covered than there actually was. Perhaps that’s the case? Another person in the thread insists to look at the X-map for a better rendition of what parts of the map were actually covered. Fewer shaders make it look more precise, I’m sure.

Apparently, someone actually called Nintendo on the phone and inquired about these discrepancies. They said they received many complaints of this kind and were “looking into it.” That’s corporate jargon for “doing nothing whatsoever.”

Some are also citing the algorithm being flawed. Unless you can see what it actually is, you can’t really blame something you can’t see at all. There were also server complaints, which is common with Splatfest because so many people are online. Should Nintendo have more servers running? They have to if they are going to start charging for the service. Put that money to good use.

One really great suggestion was “story reasons.” Like, did Nintendo want to change the ongoing feud between Pearl and Marina over who wins more? I love Marina personally, but I doubt that’s the case. Otherwise, we have reports of characters flying and other people who probably were cheating. Doesn’t mean the whole team was cheating. Splatoon 2 has cheaters, but not on this level.

Finally, there are reports of people who have second accounts logging into teams and going AFK on purpose to sabotage the team. If that really happens, man, that’s crazy. It implies someone owns two Nintendo Switches and two Switch Online accounts. That’s quite the accusation. An expensive one. [EDIT: Chet is an idiot and didn’t realize people could just another account on their own Switch and get a family plan with Switch Online.]

Truly, this Splatfest had a lot more going on with it than prior games. The jump to going 48 hours, along with the change to the clout system from the winner counts definitely have had effects on the game. All we can hope is that if Nintendo is aware of some of these issues, they can take care of them.

What matters most, is you remember to have fun. This is Splatoon, not Call of Duty. People actually have fun here.

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October 5th, 2018 by Kurt "Chet" Christel

Splatoween comes to Inkopolis!

The greatest celebration of squid culture is once again poised to take place this October 2018. Of course, being synonymous with the month and the season, it’s safe to say that this round will pit team Cider against team Pumpkin Spi- wait. Oh no, scratch that. The upcoming splatfest is going to be team Trick vs team Treat. I guess that’s okay too. I mean we do need to settle the score between Cider and Pumpkin Spice, but that can be tabled for another day (although Cider is superior, fight me). Yes yes yes, we are getting a Halloween special for this month. So, which team will you choose? Consider the following:

Team Trick is for people who live their lives waiting for Halloween to drop. For many, Christmas is only second fiddle to Halloween. It is the greatest celebration of the horror genre on the calendar. But also for cosplayers, it’s for them too. Giving people a scare while wearing plastic vampire teeth, drinking fake blood, and howling at the moon is all part of the jam. You probably also like the Nightmare Before Christmas, but whether that’s a Halloween movie or Christmas movie is up to you (it’s a garbage movie, fight me). Join team trick if you’re there for the thrills and chills!

Team Treat on the other hand, is all about one thang, and one thang only. Murdering your teeth and stomach with gobs of candy. Reese peanut butter cups, Snickers, 3 Musketeers, Twizzlers, Milky Way, Whoppers, Milk Duds, Gummies, Lollipops, the list goes on. That or you get to the sick sick people who hand out Juji Fruit, Jujubes, and those mysterious black and orange wrapped sticky things that taste like chewy sawdust. Whether you’re a young trick-or-treater going door to door asking for candy or stealing from candy jar (or siblings) candy at parties, you got a sweet tooth.

I don’t know about you but it’s all about the TREATS for me. Halloween is the night where you not only treat yourself, you get knocked into a food coma over the amount of sugar you just consumed in one hour. Or get hyper, depends person to person. Either way, I’m fighting for team TREAT!

Oh, and one more thing. This Splatfest is going to go on for 48 hours. That’s right, that’s double the amount of splat-tacular action in one splatfest. Which is great because last time I only ended up with 30 minutes to play. But for this one, you get to play between October 19th to October 21st. For our North American friends, it starts @ 6PM Eastern time on the 19th, and ends @ 6PM ET on the 21st. Grab your dualies and prepare for a scare.




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splatfest september 2018
September 20th, 2018 by Kurt "Chet" Christel

…for 30 minutes.

This is a let’s play in which Chet attempts to rank up during the splatfest, with only 30 minutes left on the clock. Can he pull it off? Answer is… not likely. Team retro failed hard, apparently. Oh well.




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September 19th, 2018 by Kurt "Chet" Christel

Retro vs Modern

-The Splatfest for September 2018 asks, “What’s your style?”

-Splatfest launches @ Midnight, Sept 22nd.

The time has come once again to celebrate the greatest festival in all of squid culture. We are of course talking about Splatoon 2’s latest splatfest. For the month of September, it seems as though the theme is based on fashion. Retro vs Modern! Do you like to be hip and fresh, or rock it old school? To be honest, Retro vs Modern is kind of vague, don’t you think? I mean, a big proponent of modern culture is based on deviations from retro culture. The New 10s decade has sought a lot of inspiration from the 80s and 90s. In a world dominated by art styles like “vaporwave”, where does the line get drawn? Where does old fashioned end? Where does modern begin? Really makes you do the big think.

I, Chet, will be joining team RETRO this time, based on this evaluation. For it is the retro styles that govern what makes modern fashion so… fashionable. Mixing and matching different color schemes, adding new takes. Modern style is affected quite frequently by various interpretations of what made retro styles so cool to begin with. Look at game design itself. You have so many different games that base their locations on retro-futuristic ideals. You see? Retro styles bascially ARE modern styles, and that’s why TEAM RETRO will win this Splatfest. Or at least, it will win the popular vote. As always, the team with the most passion and the most skill will be the ones to reign champions. Be there, or be square, all day September 22nd. Tell us what you think is the best choice to go for in the comments. And enjoy this slideshow from OFF THE HOOK if you want to know more.

Splatfest September 2018 – 9/22 | Retro vs Modern




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September 2nd, 2018 by Kurt "Chet" Christel

Where’s the SPORK option?

Hey there, Chet here. Splatoon continues to be the game that I will return to one time every month just to partake in the Splatfest. I have an absolute massive mountain of work to do. This goes between playing games for review, editing videos, doing audio, and attending IRL events. Yet, I make sure I can clear at least a few hours to play Splatfest. I do it the very moment it gets announced. The challenge of FORK vs SPOON yet another link in their genius X vs Y schemes. To be honest, the TMNT one was just okay.

This time I joined team SPOON because I think the the Spoon is more versatily. You can technically cut things with it if you try hard. But it’s good for soup, and that’s the most important thing. Anyway, if you want to join me and my Inkroller shenanigans, you can check out the footage I recorded right here.

First Session

Second Session

Post-Session Salmon Run




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August 5th, 2018 by Kurt "Chet" Christel

Play Splatoon at 2am, Why not?


This was a bit more hilarious than expected, as Chet manages to say so many stupid things in 15 minutes time while playing a game made for children.

More matches




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May 24th, 2018 by Kurt "Chet" Christel

Okay it’s less than 45 by a couple minutes.

bottom text




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May 24th, 2018 by Kurt "Chet" Christel

I mean I just asked for one little favor and the next thing I know I’m making ink sacrifices.

This deal’s getting worse all the time! Conversion clip @ 23:00 if you want to spoil the rest of the video that I worked REALLY HARD on making just for you.

Also this.




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April 13th, 2018 by Kurt "Chet" Christel

Baseball FTW

I’m not much of a talker but if you’re in the mood for some tactical paint-roller action, there’s worse ways to spend 44 minutes.




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